Thursday, January 04, 2018

My Word Of 2018

My word of 2018

 (warm) MASTERY

For years and decades I have been a lot of things in my career and really amazing at many parts , really good at others , good in others , good enough in other areas and not so good in some areas

No one really notices anything but the super amazing parts and those have been the parts that have allowed me to climb up the career ladder quite quickly and also turn my part time company into a full time successful business almost overnight .

I have been thinking more and more that I want to focus mostly on the things I am brilliant at . That make my business remarkable . The things that I was born to do and born to share . That obsess me and engage me and make me passionate.

And I do focus on these a lot . More and more but not enough

Not nearly enough

And why ?
Because it feels comfortable to be a jack of all trades as I am in high demand almost always because of it .
Then what ends up happening is because I am always busy in my career I end up not having enough to time to develop my «  purple cow «  ( Seth Godin )

I end up doing some really remarkable stuff and some more mediocre .
I want more remarkable and I know how to get it . There are just not enough hours in a day

I want to master
And I will in 2018

( what’s interesting about this word of the year is not sure I have ever chosen one that is So explicitly career focused . Mostly it is things in my family or personal life I want to improve in or master . A few years ago after realizing how much energy I was putting into family and personal relationships and not necessarily feeling as fulfilled as I wanted to in giving so much and not necessarily receiving as much ( also to do with my kids stages of life ) I decided that there would be a time and a place for my career more and more . And I have carved out that time and space over the last few years but want more and more of it . Not at the detriment of my relationships but lovinging alongside them . For years and years I prioritized my family and close relationships more than career and in most ways loved doing this and am happy I did . This stage of my life ? Not sure that same lens fits . I have so much to give and has occurred to me over the years that I may need a wider larger audience . I give and also expect a lot . It s time for me to move out into the bigger world . And master .

I am so excited for 2018 . Like really ? This will be be very very exciting for me

After I wrote the word mastery I realized that it was missing something and so added the word warm even though that is cheating for having a word of the year 

I realize I will never have to remind myself to be driven and results driven . I could do that in my sleep literally . What I have needed to remind myself so often all these years and have heavily worked on are all the soft skills and human touch like nurturing and being kind and patient and being present and letting go of control . These things come so much less naturally to me but I have improved so much and mastered them on my own ways through my attention and awareness to them and my focus . They have always been my words of the year .
So I don't want to forget them at all as the minute I do I see s difference in my life and not a positive one . I don't like myself as much and I bet those around me don't either .

So since my word of the year is results driven and career focused this year it's gonna be a warm mastery and to me I know exactly what that means 

How did I fair on my word of 2017 ? EXTRAORDINARY

Well it seemed very much in jepordy just 13 days after I wrote it . Very very much so . There are certain things I can write on this blog and certain things I cannot share and this is one of them . 
Let's just say my life and my family's nearly  fell fully apart that week as we know it - and by laser focus and total commitment and reaching out to people we knew could help us - we remained happier than we have ever been and even stronger than we thought possible .

Emotional vulnerability to the max ( thanks soul keeper for introducing me to this concept in life and holding my hand patiently as I practice it )

So ya . I would consider that pretty extraordinaire . 

My mom commented after that whole fiasco that she felt so bad for me that I had chosen that word for my year and just mere days later I had a very unexpected unthinkable situation 
This is where my moms thinking and mine differ : no situation or person or circumstance will rob me of my word . Never . Extraordinary as my compass is what got me through 

Besides that I was able to at least double my business , survive and thrive three teens in the house , finally finally have massive breakthrough in my relationship with my daughter , continue in my path of not being co dependant with my mom ( still lots of work there ) , write half of my second book that will be published in 2018 besides working full time and really understand  and feel and practice the meaning of emotional vulnerability in close relationships something that was always attractive to me in the past but that I didn't really experience fully . 
This way of being really was a game changer for me and I will never go back to any of my old ways in this . It’s here to stay

Less extraordinary have been : having committed to health and fitness for a full year and then abandoning and now back again but still inconsistent . Eating great during week and way not so great on weekends and have never figured this out and feeling it a lot in my energy and around my waistline  . Being so so not domestic around the house  it is literally a joke at this point . Not being as Social as I want to be . Still worrying about my mom all the time and her health even though there is nothing I can do to control it  . Not being able to control the fact my daughter may need spinal fusion , another struggling with severe acne and the horrible  side effects of the medication he needs to take as a last resort . Being bitchy a lot of the time despite my best efforts . Feeling jealous and envious for no apparent reason and not being able to get my kids to do their to do lists when I am gone ( or sometimes even when I am home ). Also still a challenge for me to let my kids go on many ways . I really want to hang on but more and more with the eldest realizing I cannot

Yet I am very self aware I think and know my strengths and my weaknesses ( I think ! ) and constantly strive to work through them and improve then . 
I am a constant learner and constantly in motion in life and in love and always looking and seeking feedback to get better and improve
I give the truth and I expect it back . And I put that truth into action 

And so yes 2017 I was extraordinary . In ways I had never even planned or even knew existed .

I have realized that the more I surround myself with extraordinary people the more extraordinary my life becomes and the more in tune with myself and life I become . I have to keep opening myself up to new experiences and new people - something I have always resisted in some ways and tend to stay within my comfort zone .

Here to continued extraordinary and warm mastery !

Welcome 2018 !!