I am missing
the beach but coming home has been fun too. I realize that it is the balance
between work hard play hard that sustains me and keeps me happy and motivated. Maintaining
and keeping that balance however is often much harder than it appears and takes a
whole lot of planning and strategizing and going to bat for what I want for my
family and me.
But coming
back to my kids has been so nice. I realize how just normal everyday stuff is
so precious and important and puts big smiles on my face:
Like Beauty
parent teacher meeting. Seeing Beauty in her element sitting there glowing with
the praise of her teacher. He teacher this year is THE coolest person ever.
Talks about boys and kissing and watches all the PG movies and not just the G
ones and discusses them all with her students. She is sent from the heavens
this young woman and we love her. Seeing the relationship between her and our
daughter was amazing. The synergy, the love, the pride, the honesty.
Made me realize
the importance of the influence of other roles models in our kids’ lives and
how what we see of them is only part of them. There is so much more to their
lives beyond our family and as they get older this piece increases and grows.
Seeing Bear.He
was in a bit of a crappy mood before we left for a few weeks and difficult and
a bit distant. We come home and he says “I am done now. Finished with that
part. I think I will have puberty soon-look at my zits!!! (All excited). He is
just such a beautiful, beautiful, kind hearted (stubborn, difficult, demanding)
person. There are parts of me that look far into the future and see this son as
a man and our lives together…I can see it all so clearly.
Chase who
sent me an important text saying we needed to speak and that he was unhappy
with me. Moi??? Took him 12 hrs to admit that his friend told him about his
surprise bday party for 16th skiing an told me that he was not happy I had planned
this.AT ALL. Of course I am thoroughly disappointed..,but
I was proud that he stood up for his needs and asserted himself and gave feedback
in a direct and proper manner. And he told me basically the rules of adolescence
and parents with friends. Never ever text his friends and it is so not cooI . I
learnt a lot last night!!!!
And this
morning at cottage taking a weekend to reconnect as a family. A big family
cuddle in bed…going out to have Chase drive on small streets…..planning X-mas
lists….family fire talks with various shifts mom and dad have come up with in
the family on vacation as always that they will roll their eyes too…We are the
Miller’s movie tonight…Mexican for dinner in the kitchen…..making snow rails in
the snow……a game of Clue..lots of homework….a bunch of work and emails for
catch up for me by the fire….
Life is good,
whether on vacation or off vacation. With it’s many challenges and obstacles…and
wonderful moments. I love it all and will take it all.
I have a
big new role at work now too that I just begun. And I realize that
everything surrounding it is exactly what I need right now. I am ready to take
on a whole different ball game….but not ready to leave the family to far behind
me either. Both my work and my family will remain a massive focus for the next
4 yrs. Status quo with a whole lot of new enhancements.
I am exactly
where I need to be. Took me a whole to realize but I am here. And here is the
best place I could be. Sometimes my wanting can get ahead of my needing if I don’t
stop myself. But the want and need are unified and will stay that way for the
next few years.
A series of
good decisions and outcomes.
I realized on
my trip that this blog has really made a difference in my life. I may use it
differently than others (not comments much except for emails, don’t comment
much on other’s blogs except friends, don’t connect blog to social media etc..)
but it has served a big purpose in my life the way I use it and it is being
honest about my life and where I am and where I want to be. It has been a self-discovery
tool with a lot of traffic for me …fun to see others following my journey….without
the big commitment of responding back and forth that always turned me off of
blogs in the past (except for with close people who I love commenting and discussing
blogs with but no time for strangers at this stage of my life).
Thank you Savvy
for the introduction (and I was a tough one as I was so resistant and negative
at first) to this new world for me
