I got wind of my texting usage by seeing my mobility bill
and it is much higher in the texting area than peers I am guessing. And that
made me think a lot..and reflect and… even laugh a little.
Because it is funny. I am one of the most disciplined
people I know when it comes to technology and setting limitations for myself and
my family. I am also so technologically backwards and archaic (I have no Facebook,
no Twitter, no instagram, NADA because I feel it takes away from my present
life) My friends laugh at me all the time about this!!!
But
clearly texting is my thing. And being connected is my thing too.
So it all stared making sense.
I text a ton when the right moment presents itself. I
have times when I text and times when I do not. It is a relaxation thing for
me-I could literally send out 100 texts at 11pm at night in short conversations-that
is how I do things “ Hi” “How are you” I
love you” Goodnight” Ping! Ping! Ping! And I adore this quick efficient
communication of letting people know how much they are on my mind and finding
out how much I am on theirs. Let’s just say unlimited texting packages are made
for me bc one conversation could be 200 texts of one word each..I love it.
I am the queen of technogy “rules” for myself :
Though shalt not text at dinner ever
Though should not text when there are kids around in
family time
Thou shall not text during working time when I need my focus unless in crisis
or kids conversations afterschool to check in and have then nice cheerful
texting conversation
Thou shalt always text to take a break for 5 mins after a completion
of a big project instead of getting coffee or a chocolate bar from vending making.
Thou shall pee and text simultaneously as needed.
Though shall cuddle thou husband for one hour in bed before
connecting with anyone else
Thou shall never text during meetings or have phone on
unless it is a hospital calling or someone is in surgery (you can see where my
life has been lately!!!)
Thou shalt never ignore the person in front of you for texting
Thou shalt never ever waste a precious moment of life on
/facebook, Twitter or Instargram until thou art retired or semi-retired.
I am also the queen
of sounds and alerts off unless certain hours of day etc. for minimal
distraction. I use my phone for everything. Contacts, notes, second computer
screens, photos, agenda, calendars, sending emails. My phone is part of me…if
it kept beeping to show me a new email or text I think I would shoot myself!!!
So I tune all alerts and displays off and then go crazy at lunch in the stir fry
line for 10 mins answering back. I love connecting in the stir fry line. Maybe
a bit anti-social to my colleagues but I consider those 10 minutes of waiting
my time. I feel I have earned it !
And it is funny to compare myself to others. Maybe others
are not big texters but their alerts go off every second in meetings for their
email and then answer i! Or during group lunch they email! Or they are on
Twitter and Instagram throughout the day or the chat function! Everyone has
their own patterns. Modern society has certainly complicated the world hasn’t it?
So it was funny to see what an extreme texter I am given
all these rules for myself. It was to me a true paradox about myself. Tons of
rules for myself..Tons of limitations…but also pure connectedness is very important
to me. Productivity in life and Connected are probably the two areas that
define me. Texting meets both of these purposes for me as quick and short but
connected and frequent…and also allows me to be super productive in my life.
Was an interesting epiphany for me.
And I saw how people can easily become addicted to
technology if they don’t set limitations for themselves with devices. I saw it
for 8 weeks between January and March where I lost control of my own rules for
the first time. I was in such state of many personal crisis (three main ones
and 2 minor inor ones all simultaneously) that in order to function I texted
and texted so much. No boundaries, no rules. Alerts on and ping ping ping I
would answer. I needed it like oxygen. I should have listened to my doctor and
taken a month of work but I felt I could not do that-so I took the next best
thing and had no rules for myself. I abandoned the me who is a perfectionist
and so rigid with this stuff. And I kept all the balls in the air successfully.
I delivered at work. Delivered at home..Indulged myself to massive comfort and
connection. Did I deliver as well as the other months and years of my life? Probably
not-but I did my very best. And I worked my ass off to keep these balls in the
air…and keep connected. What got left behind were sleep and showers and shopping
I would say. Sometimes I would work at night 1-4am! Sometimes I would text at
11am-12pm! It was all messed up those 8 weeks and although I needed it…I hated
it an resented it. It was exhausting. Totally exhausting to be so connected
with alerts and sounds one indicating the next new message. How does anyone do
this long term???? I think during that time I even kept my phone pinging in the
car!!!
Anyways as a few weeks ago although the things in my life
that caused these crisis..are still there…I am in a different place about them
now. Thanks God and I am back to my normal ritualized, rule ridden, strict but
connected self.
I got both great surprise and great pleasure by seeing
how much I text. It confirmed to me that I am where I want to be. With not one
part of my life sacrificing the other. Delivering..Career woman… high performer
..wife..mom..friend,,,daughter. Delivering and Connecting. What I would want to
be known for and respected for when it all comes down to it. Work Hard. Play
Hard.
Being able to integrate it all in a way that makes sense.
Under my own ritualized and watchful eye of self awareness
