A Book (or Two)

So many of my friends and family have been asking me about the book I have co-authored. Just like work stuff, I don’t tend to bring up the book all that much –so a big thanks for all the caring and interest and support!

And the book is finished! It is now in the main author’s hands and he is working with an editor. He is looking at options for publications since I am from Canada and he from Europe and so USA publication not easy. He is weighting different options right now to get that book out.

It has been an amazing experience for me. Was a really hard last year and a half to be on such big deadlines and I had to carefully plan weekly time to devote to it. Writing a book with him specifically worked very well for me as we have been international collogues for years and so know each other very well and how the other functions and works. Our relationship has always had work at the center so was an easy and comfortable process for us.

From a creative standpoint however, it is very hard to co-author a book vs write one alone. Also it is his book and I am contributing to my creative flow obviously had barriers and limitation inherent to the type of project. For me the process of writing a book I always imagined words pouring out of my heart and soul…and in this case it could not be that way so it was a very different experience in that sense. But the final product will be amazing and I am so thrilled that I was given this great opportunity.

The title: “More Life, Please!”

More to come when published! But again thank you to all who have been so actively supportive and interested and happy for me.

On another similar note it is boating time since summer. My favorite thing to do in the world is to sit in the front of our boat while my husband drives and let the warm wind blow my hair and have the sun on my face. It is in these moments that I do my very best thinking. My creative thinking is always done there in my own la la land (that is why spotting kids riding tube interrupts my thoughts)

On these boat rides I know that I am a writer from the depths of my soul. Book titles, paragraphs, back covers all come to mind. Books I could write one day.

The problem is I am not a writer nor do I really have any aspiration to be one. But in my heart..I am definitely a writer (somehow I like the money, structure ,status and perks and security that come with other types of careers!)

But for years and years and years I have been deciding what my own book would be. Have had thousands of ideas..all written down for inspiration..but nothing has ever fully clicked to the point where I would say “I am doing that”

The other day it did. It will be a memoir that I start writing in the Fall. I can’t tell the title yet…..but I will one day soon. I never thought it would be a memoir I would write but I know it is the right thing. It will be based on this year -2014- and three major events that have occurred in my life and both how I have dealt with them all and also the lessons I have learnt.

And you know what? I think it is going to be really really good.

And I just have to think about if I am ready to have my family fully exposed? Are they ready and willing? Am I capable of being as vulnerable as I need to be to write it powerfully? Can it be a great keynote speech? How would it feel to family and friends to be written about in some of my deepest thoughts inside of me only available to me at this moment? All things to think about.

But that feeling of knowing what I needed to write was powerful. Almost felt like I had been working up to that moment all my life. If nothing else will be a very therapeutic process for me. And hopefully one day a very profitable one. For years I have felt I have so much inside of me…I do share a lot with others…but not even a fraction of what I know or feel. I support others a lot more than I am supportable myself. I share in others’ lives a lot more than they share in mine (except person who is that exception). This book would alter that. Scares me.

And what I love is that it does not need to replace my work . It can be hobby. I am not the type of writer than takes hours and hours and hours to write a blog. Takes me minutes really. Same for books..I am not a perfectionist at all (clearly as you can see by my typos!) Writing has always been a casual process for me “Get it out of my mind and body" being my primary concern to date. I won’t have a dedication of “thanks for my family for seeing me locked up writing for three years” Never. I am locked up enough in my life as it is…

So..that is my book update.

And still..I am not a writer.

But maybe..or maybe not…I will still have something to offer that people will want to read. In the last few years, I think I have finally figured a lot of stuff out. And I have done a damn good job of being a Mom, a wife, having a career, writing a book and keeping my shit together this year under very difficult circumstances. Has been far from perfect but graceful I think nonetheless. I have still managed to shower and make food (well defrost it or delegate it) wear nice clothes and be a good friend, lend my cottage to my mom and flush the fish down the toilet when it died. I have forgiven and forgotten, held my ground, excercise and taken up yoga. I have remembered birthdays and had birthdays and kissed boo-boos and still have socialzed. I have held it together for myself and many at a time when I thought I could have fallen apart or been more selfish with my love....I have chosen love first.

And it is time to share my story. Because you know what? I have some good stuff to share. Stuff that can make a difference in the world.
And it is time..to share my secrets