I was going to sit here tonight and write a blog about
how amazing of an evening we all had.
Monday night I am always alone with the kids and I have
been trying to make that time always a little special. Whether it’s taking 15
minutes extra to tuck one in or chat in front of the fire about something that
is on their mind with another…I find myself making more space for them on that
evening. When my to do lists are at their worst and literally calling my name
after weekends away at the cottage. But lately I have really been selecting how
to spend time and spending these extra few minutes with the kids always seems
to make me feel better in the longer term.
So tonight even if I am sick as a dog, I hid a note with
the elf that we would all watch a 30 minute Christmas special together and eat
in front of the TV. As they sat there eating their pasta and yogurt and fruit
and loving the babyish Christmas tale. I thought life is beautiful. This is a
perfect moment.
Well it wasn’t afterall.
I made a bad decision. I decided to take a chance and
offer more. I told them that if they quickly did 10 minutes of chores and clean
up calmly they could come back to watch another episode of Rudolph and we could
all snuggle on the couch.
Well Beauty listened. The two boys did not. And like
every single night in my house…chaos erupts as soon as there is transition or
chores to do or as soon as a command is given out to accomplish something that is
not individual. I am really,really fed up. And very very disappointed in myself
that I have somehow let this go on for so long. Now it is not only my older son
who is so disruptive it is my middle son too and it bugs the hell out of me.
Just shut up and do what you have to do.
Stop acting like a bunch of idiots for 10 mins. Is that
possible?
So they wrestled and laughed and got distracted and
fooled around and threw their wallets around the kitchen until all their cards
and bus passes feel all over. I was silent.
I should have just go in and said go to bed.
But I totally and completely lost it. I screamed and screamed
and told them exactly what I think of them. I told one that I may even smack
him across the face if he dare speak another word. I told them that they were
grounded for a second day tomorrow (they were grounded tonight for hyperness
too from the weekend). I also told them no breakfast made by Dad tomorrow and
that no carpool. Walk and take the bus.
And I meant every single word. And I am not the least bit
sorry.
Ya..I am sure that there may have been better ways to
handle the situation but apparently those better ways are not working. So I
will try it this way.
I hope they feel cold outside tomorrow and tired and
sorry.
I would feel guilty if one of my sweetest BFF’s this week
SAHM did not tell me that she calls her kids idiots weekly.in a very loud
voice. And makes them cry. Thank God for her honesty..it frees me up.
I am done with this type of chaos each time it is time to
work and not play.
And you know whose fault this is? Mine!
I am like those Moms that I have to hear daily complain
about how “they can’t get their kid to stop texting and face booking though
homework period and so their kid takes 5 hrs. to complete studies” Well madam
that is because you ALLOW this.
Well I have joined the ranks of these Moms. Ya the ones
who come to me for coaching. Those ones. I allow a ZOO in my home every night
and for some reason until now I have not put my foot down enough.
Well the time has come friends.
An no I will not be medicating you all after dinner to be
calm and cooperative. Simply, if someone is not calm and concentrated during
chore time, they will immediately be excused (from their chores too) and they
will be asked to go to bed or to study in their room. The evening ends there.
No more. They will immediately receive 3 x’s for chores not done on the chart
which will equal less allowance on chart and I will complete their tasks (and
be compensated for it) If goes on for a few nights in a row-then technology
gone for days at a time.
That is it. Silent. Calm Friendly. Goodnight.
Still want o be coached by me??? Of course you do!!!!!!!!
This is what you love about me right??? Real, honest and HUMAN. Mother to two
and sometimes three gorillas.:)))
