I work in HR and have for years. Something that has
always shocked me is how anyone could possibly just give up any of their
vacation days. Just give them up….poouf.. Gone. Back to the bank of the company
to do nothing with. To me this is about the same as committing a crime. A
felony. Not human actually.
But it is done by millions of employees around the world over and over.
However I also read an article this week that said 70
percent of Canadians admit to “texting often” while driving so why would I
consider giving up vacation as criminal really? Hey I want to send out a tweet
about the cake I baked why not take the chance of killing that nice family in
the car in front of me??
I guess over and over the human race (including myself)
shock and surprise me. And disappoint me on many levels too (myself again
included). So many times a day a month a year a decade I look at the world (and
myself) and say “Really? Is that possible?”
Naïve naïve little baby girl here clearly
So many things people around me do (or don’t do). Or say
(or don’t say) shock and disappoint me. Constantly. (Again myself and my family
included).
Naïve naïve little baby girl here clearly . Yes I repeated
this again for some extra effect.
Clearly I am getting away from the subject of back to
reality and regressing because of my bitter mood right now. Ya so what? It’s my
blog right?
So tonight is back to reality for us all. Laundry,
cleaning, organizing, lists, preparing for work and school. Of course with the
break for Downtown Abbey at 9pm if we can fit it in.
And back to reality it is. A big reality. A really really
really big reality.
And how do I feel? Agitated about many many many things
right now. Irritable about many many things too. Since losing our housekeeper
earlier this year…it seems the world is giving us the message that we have to
get our act together. Completely alone. And we will. Bring on the medical
issues! The new jobs! The financial stuff! The problems! The lack of help! Minor
and major inconveniences!
We
are ready for it all. Personally I am one tough cookie.
So yes agitated, irritable..alienated,,detached,,disappointed
are all high on top of my list of back to reality feelings.
I have a chapter to write of a book this week and a new
leadership role to take on in between the laundry, the dishes, the driving, the
food, the meals, the Christmas tree coming down…and a whole lot more.
But somewhere amidst that irritability and agitation and
fear……….is serenity and peace. Yes folks you heard right it is there. It is
present. It is inside of me.
And the more I fend of my disappointment and agitation
with the world..and depend on myself and my little family; The more I self
contain ourselves and be together and talk together an understand each other
and are self-sufficient….that serenity is also present.
We have built a palace in our family. And that palace is
my place; my haven and I thank god for it everyday.
I feel like a huge salami and pastrami sandwich. With
lots of mustard and mayonnaise and lettuce and tomatoes and pickles and olives
and juice pouring from the seams of it….with right in the very very very center
a little red pepper jelly that no one even realises it there. A little red dot
of peace and joy and hope and a bust of beautiful flavor just for us. And none
can help us put it there or find it or eat it except for the five of us.And
trust me we will find that red pepper jelly people. We will find it and gobble
it right up.
Back to reality. Alone together. Family of five.
Organized Chaos.
Thank you housekeeper for quitting. You saved my soul in
the end.
